The Life of the mar’d Brother John Bentham who was called Home the 9th August 1772.
He has dictated the following concerning himself.
I was born at Black Hay in Pudsey Township1713 & baptised in the Church of England My Mother being poor & not able to care for me I was put out by the family as a Towns apprentice to a Presbiterian. I had no Mind to go on Sundays with any Master to his place of Worship, & having no Concern on my Mind about my Salvation I went no where. My Master observing this told me I should be lost if I continued in the way I then was, & should go to a place of Torment when I died. This had the Effect upon me that I went to Church & then I thought my Case was safe, but even this proved the Occasion to hurtful Entanglements, & also to my marryingunhappily which was attended with many painful Consequences. By this Marriage I had 2 Daughters. When Mr. Ingham began to preach in these parts I want to hear him, & the Word had some Effect upon me for some Time, but alas, I soon got into my old wretched Course again. Being one Sunday at Tong Church I was asked by the late BrJonathan Heartly to go with him to hear the Brethren at Bankhouse; at first I told him I would not, but he however prevailed upon so to do, & I have abundant Reason to thank my dear Savr that He inclined me to go. What I there heard of the Love of our Savrmelted my heart & had the Effect upon me that I returned home in a very different Mind to what I had before, being now determined to seek in earnest after the Salvation of my Soul, nor could I afterwards have Rest or Satisfaction till I found Mercy & peace in Jesus Christ. Soon after this I was rec’d into the Society, & March 25th 1758 I was red’d into the Congn, & the same Year was admitted to the holy Communion & spent my Time in a truly happy Manner in sweet Fellowship with my kind Lord & Redeemer. This was a most
blessed Season to my poor Heart, & happy would it have been for me if I had remained in this Connexion with my Savr but turning aside from Him & not proving this Grace nightly I gave Opportunity to the Enemy to blind my Eyes again, to lay hold of me as his Captive & to lead me according to his Will, & thus was brought into most shameful & scandalous Things to the unspeakable Grief of the whole Congn, & still more to the Grief & Reproach of my merciful Savr, & which was oftenwards attended Lord with much Loss, Distress & Anguish to my own Soul as no one but myself can have a true Conception of. I brought myself into Hell Torment indeed for I forfeited my place & privileges in the Congn, & lost all Sight & feeling of my Savr & my Sins lay so heavy upon me that I knew no possible way of living in this Condition, All which Misery was occasioned by the well known Circumstances of my second Marriage. I & my wife being both guilty & also both miserable & unhappy beyond Description we knew not what to do but to weep & cry to Jesus that if possible He might look on us in our deplorable Condition & shew Mercy unto us. He was also entreated of us & had Mercy upon such abominable Sinners as we were, that we could believe & feel that He had pardoned our many & heinous Transgressions. We then prayed the whole Congn to forgive us & receive us once more into her Fellowship & which in Time was granted unto us to our abiding Consolation. This was a Grace which I shall thank my sweet Savr for throughout my whole Life & also in Eternity. From this Time I have been enabled to live under a bowing Sense of my sweet Savrs Love, & the Blessings I have enjoyed in the Congn have been highly prized by me; yea every the least
Crumb I enjoyed I rec’d out of Mercy as a Favour I was undeserving of. I shall never be able to thank Him duly for what He has done for me poor unfaithful Sinner, but shall eternally sing of his Love & Mercy & Faithfullness. So far out of his Account. Since his Readmission to the Congn he has spent his Time as a Sinner who had received Grace, & acknowledged himself very undeserving of what he enjoyed. Some Time ago his Constitution began to break & he declined gradually, but was chearful in his Heart & confident to our Savr & thus continued till he obtained permission to enter into the joy of his Lord.
